“Thanks For Loving Your Self” - God
Rev. Bill Freeman
May 16, 2021
Bill Freeman Ministries
I heard a standup comic say once, "I do self-deprecating humor. But I'm not very good at it.” (It's a thinker!)
This is the third part of my month-long Sermon Series on what could be called: Billboard Messages From God. Maybe you saw those billboards years ago that said things like: "We Need To Talk" - God. Today's Sermon title is: "Thanks For Loving Your Self” - God.
What do we mean by loving your self? Well, according to the Brain and Behavior Research Foundation (which by the way, when I die they would like to examine my brain—no I'm just kidding, besides they wouldn't find anything up there); anyway the Brain and Behavior Research Foundation says, “Self-love means having a high regard for your own well-being and happiness."
There is a danger in loving your self too much. You could become selfish, self absorbed, and self-centered. You could have an ego that's out of control. You could ignore the needs of others and only care about your own needs. In other words, don't become Narcissus, the character from Greek Mythology, who fell in love with his own reflection in the water, and stared at it for the rest of his life. But if you can avoid all that, and love your self in a healthy way, then God will say to you, "Thanks for loving your self" - God.
Loving your self is implied in Jesus’ two great commandments. According to the Christian New Testament, in the Gospel of Matthew, which we read last week, because it pertains to loving others, which we talked about last week, when Jesus is asked: What's the greatest commandment? Jesus replies: Love God with all your heart, soul, and mind. This is the greatest and first commandment. And a second is like it. Love your neighbor as you love yourself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.
I would like to suggest that Jesus has described three great Commandments. Love God. Love your neighbor. And love your self. I would also like to suggest that you can't love God or your neighbor until you first love your self.
It's like when you're on a plane. They tell you if the oxygen mask comes down, you have to put your oxygen mask on first, before you put oxygen masks on anyone else, or you could be overcome by not getting oxygen, and you could pass out and die, and not be any good to any body.
Similarly, you have to love your self first before you can love anyone else, because you need the oxygen of love, before you can give that loving oxygen to anyone else. If you hate your self, how can you love others? If you hate yourself, how can you love God? When you're able to love your self, you can then love others, and you can then love God. And God will say to you, "Thanks for loving your self" - God.
We see the same thing in the Hebrew Scriptures. In the book of Leviticus, which we also read last week, because it talks about loving others, which we talked about last week, it says: Love your neighbor as your self. Again, I believe you can't love your neighbor until you can first love your self.
When we see the same thing in the two books of the Bible—the Hebrew Scriptures and the Christian New Testament—it's probably a good idea to pay attention, because what they're saying is usually important. (Unless they're both saying that slavery is a good thing or that homosexuality is a bad thing.) But in this case they're both saying: Love your neighbor as your self, which also means to love your self.
How can you love your self? Well, according to Psychology Today, there are three things you can do to show love for your self. First, care as much about your self as you care about others. In other words, to paraphrase the Golden Rule: Do unto your self as you would do unto others. Second, maintain your boundaries. In other words, know what you will and won't accept from others: physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. And third, do what you need to do to be you. In other words, do as much as you can that makes you happy, and do as little as you can that does not make you happy.
I belong to a clergy support group. Somebody asked me how can I be so calm, given the pandemic and changes in the church, like doing zoom worship, instead of in-person worship. Well, I like doing Zoom worship, because we’re not just confined to one geographic area. (And people don’t have to get dressed up to come to worship.) Also I quoted the title of a little book I’d read years ago called, "Don't sweat the small stuff…And it's all small stuff.” So I try not to worry, maybe because I know that would hurt my self. And as Jesus says: What good does it do to worry? After all, you can't change the past, the present, or the future by worrying. And I guess I want God to say to me, "Thanks for loving your self” - God.
Oscar Wilde said, "Be yourself. Everyone else is taken."
You can't love yourself until you can learn to be your self. Until you can learn to respect your self. Until you can feel good about your self. In other words, until you can feel comfortable in your own skin.
It's like the story of a rabbi I heard about. The rabbi cries out to heaven: God, make me like Abraham. And a voice comes from heaven saying: “I already have one Abraham. I want you to be you.” In other words, you have to be your self. You can’t be anyone else. As much as I might want to be James Garner, it ain't gonna happen. I have to accept myself for who I am. And you have to accept your self for who you are. (Besides, if I tried to be James Garner, I might hear a voice coming from heaven saying: I already have one James Garner, I want you to be you.)
Before you can accept your self and love your self, you may have to forgive your self. Forgive your self for any mistakes you've made in the past. Forgive your self for any mistakes you'll make in the future. In other words forgive your self for not being perfect. When you can do that, and you can love your self, then God will say to you, "Thanks for loving your self" - God.
It's like the hymn, "Christian Rise And Act Your Creed." The hymn begins, "Christian rise and act your creed; let your prayer be in your deed."
In other words, if you want to love your self, you can’t just talk the talk; you also have to walk the talk. I walked the talk recently, when I picketed with some union workers and others in front of a Food4Less grocery store in L.A. The workers want better pay and they’re urging the public to boycott Food4Less. And since, to paraphrase Will Rogers, I never met a picket line I didn’t like (or walk), I walked with the workers. Because if you want to love your self, you can’t just talk the talk, you also have to walk the talk.
Al Franken played a character on Saturday night live years ago. Stuart Smalley. Stuart Smalley had daily affirmations. Like: “I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it people like me.” It's good to have affirmations. Positive affirmations. Some people have negative “affirmations,” like: I’m not good enough, I’m not smart enough, and doggone it people don’t like me. If you have negative “affirmations” playing on a loop inside your head, work to get rid of those.
When you realize you're good enough, you’re smart enough, and doggone it people like you, then hopefully you can love your self. When you do that, God will say to you, "Thanks for loving your self" - God. And when you learn to love your self, maybe you can do some self-deprecating humor. Even if you're not very good at it.
[The Sermon was based on this Text.]
Rev. Bill Freeman
May 16, 2021
Bill Freeman Ministries
I heard a standup comic say once, "I do self-deprecating humor. But I'm not very good at it.” (It's a thinker!)
This is the third part of my month-long Sermon Series on what could be called: Billboard Messages From God. Maybe you saw those billboards years ago that said things like: "We Need To Talk" - God. Today's Sermon title is: "Thanks For Loving Your Self” - God.
What do we mean by loving your self? Well, according to the Brain and Behavior Research Foundation (which by the way, when I die they would like to examine my brain—no I'm just kidding, besides they wouldn't find anything up there); anyway the Brain and Behavior Research Foundation says, “Self-love means having a high regard for your own well-being and happiness."
There is a danger in loving your self too much. You could become selfish, self absorbed, and self-centered. You could have an ego that's out of control. You could ignore the needs of others and only care about your own needs. In other words, don't become Narcissus, the character from Greek Mythology, who fell in love with his own reflection in the water, and stared at it for the rest of his life. But if you can avoid all that, and love your self in a healthy way, then God will say to you, "Thanks for loving your self" - God.
Loving your self is implied in Jesus’ two great commandments. According to the Christian New Testament, in the Gospel of Matthew, which we read last week, because it pertains to loving others, which we talked about last week, when Jesus is asked: What's the greatest commandment? Jesus replies: Love God with all your heart, soul, and mind. This is the greatest and first commandment. And a second is like it. Love your neighbor as you love yourself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.
I would like to suggest that Jesus has described three great Commandments. Love God. Love your neighbor. And love your self. I would also like to suggest that you can't love God or your neighbor until you first love your self.
It's like when you're on a plane. They tell you if the oxygen mask comes down, you have to put your oxygen mask on first, before you put oxygen masks on anyone else, or you could be overcome by not getting oxygen, and you could pass out and die, and not be any good to any body.
Similarly, you have to love your self first before you can love anyone else, because you need the oxygen of love, before you can give that loving oxygen to anyone else. If you hate your self, how can you love others? If you hate yourself, how can you love God? When you're able to love your self, you can then love others, and you can then love God. And God will say to you, "Thanks for loving your self" - God.
We see the same thing in the Hebrew Scriptures. In the book of Leviticus, which we also read last week, because it talks about loving others, which we talked about last week, it says: Love your neighbor as your self. Again, I believe you can't love your neighbor until you can first love your self.
When we see the same thing in the two books of the Bible—the Hebrew Scriptures and the Christian New Testament—it's probably a good idea to pay attention, because what they're saying is usually important. (Unless they're both saying that slavery is a good thing or that homosexuality is a bad thing.) But in this case they're both saying: Love your neighbor as your self, which also means to love your self.
How can you love your self? Well, according to Psychology Today, there are three things you can do to show love for your self. First, care as much about your self as you care about others. In other words, to paraphrase the Golden Rule: Do unto your self as you would do unto others. Second, maintain your boundaries. In other words, know what you will and won't accept from others: physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. And third, do what you need to do to be you. In other words, do as much as you can that makes you happy, and do as little as you can that does not make you happy.
I belong to a clergy support group. Somebody asked me how can I be so calm, given the pandemic and changes in the church, like doing zoom worship, instead of in-person worship. Well, I like doing Zoom worship, because we’re not just confined to one geographic area. (And people don’t have to get dressed up to come to worship.) Also I quoted the title of a little book I’d read years ago called, "Don't sweat the small stuff…And it's all small stuff.” So I try not to worry, maybe because I know that would hurt my self. And as Jesus says: What good does it do to worry? After all, you can't change the past, the present, or the future by worrying. And I guess I want God to say to me, "Thanks for loving your self” - God.
Oscar Wilde said, "Be yourself. Everyone else is taken."
You can't love yourself until you can learn to be your self. Until you can learn to respect your self. Until you can feel good about your self. In other words, until you can feel comfortable in your own skin.
It's like the story of a rabbi I heard about. The rabbi cries out to heaven: God, make me like Abraham. And a voice comes from heaven saying: “I already have one Abraham. I want you to be you.” In other words, you have to be your self. You can’t be anyone else. As much as I might want to be James Garner, it ain't gonna happen. I have to accept myself for who I am. And you have to accept your self for who you are. (Besides, if I tried to be James Garner, I might hear a voice coming from heaven saying: I already have one James Garner, I want you to be you.)
Before you can accept your self and love your self, you may have to forgive your self. Forgive your self for any mistakes you've made in the past. Forgive your self for any mistakes you'll make in the future. In other words forgive your self for not being perfect. When you can do that, and you can love your self, then God will say to you, "Thanks for loving your self" - God.
It's like the hymn, "Christian Rise And Act Your Creed." The hymn begins, "Christian rise and act your creed; let your prayer be in your deed."
In other words, if you want to love your self, you can’t just talk the talk; you also have to walk the talk. I walked the talk recently, when I picketed with some union workers and others in front of a Food4Less grocery store in L.A. The workers want better pay and they’re urging the public to boycott Food4Less. And since, to paraphrase Will Rogers, I never met a picket line I didn’t like (or walk), I walked with the workers. Because if you want to love your self, you can’t just talk the talk, you also have to walk the talk.
Al Franken played a character on Saturday night live years ago. Stuart Smalley. Stuart Smalley had daily affirmations. Like: “I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it people like me.” It's good to have affirmations. Positive affirmations. Some people have negative “affirmations,” like: I’m not good enough, I’m not smart enough, and doggone it people don’t like me. If you have negative “affirmations” playing on a loop inside your head, work to get rid of those.
When you realize you're good enough, you’re smart enough, and doggone it people like you, then hopefully you can love your self. When you do that, God will say to you, "Thanks for loving your self" - God. And when you learn to love your self, maybe you can do some self-deprecating humor. Even if you're not very good at it.
[The Sermon was based on this Text.]
